Hello beautiful people of the
federal republic, how has it been with you guys?
Welcome to a new month and yes we
have entered the …….ember months…..wow the year just started yesterday and here
we are in September already…phew…..the Lord that has led us this far will
continue to keep us…….
For the longest time I have wanted
to write something about the Father figures in our lives and the opportunity is
finally here. Who is a father? What is expected of him? What are his
obligations to the entire household? It is quite alarming that not every man
that has birthed a child earns the right to be called a father…….uhummm that’s
very true.
The English dictionary defines a father
as a male who sires and often raises a child, a male donator of sperm which
resulted in conception or fertilization. If you ask me I think there’s more to
been a father than just been a sperm donor especially in these days where we
have a lot of sperm banks….yeah you can actually get babies off the shelf.
For you to earn the right to be
called a father, you have to be available to act as one by supporting and
nurturing the child that you have sired. Most often than none you really don’t
have to be the sperm donor to act in that capacity. Some men are truly called to
be fathers and to raise a generation of God fearing children.
I read somewhere a while back that a
father is a boy’s first hero and a daughter’s first love……..thinking about it
now it’s actually very true because I have seen a few little girls that wants
to marry their daddies and little boys that think their dad can handle
everything……….look for their trouble and they tell you with all boldness that
their dad (hero) will come for you…..and you better run.
As a man what are you doing to
shape/impact the lives of your kids or the kids around you? What impact do your
character, attitude, behavior and general outlook on life have on these kids?
Do you have or make time for them? Do you know your kids or do they know you?
On a scale of 1 – 10 how can you rate your value to your kids?
I understand you have to work very
hard to put food on the table, pay the rent and bills, generally cater for the
family and you are truly doing a good job of it but nothing can fill the void
that is left in the life of your child…….24 hours is never enough but my dear
you must make time to truly be a father…..don’t leave it all to the mother,
there is a part that you need to play and no one can do it better than you.
You as a man really need to be
careful of how you act and what you say in the presence of your kids, as they
assimilate and digest your actions and see it as the norm….so if you are a man
that fear God and live according to His will, your kids too will tow that path.
I have a live example in my home, my 18 months old son knows now that you must
kneel down before you pray simply because from when he turned 12 months daddy
always tells him to kneel down whenever we want to pray, he knows where the
family alter is and anytime you say let’s pray he runs to his own corner and
starts screaming in his unclear syllables kneel down and Amen.
I recently saw a movie “Courageous”
in the movie this group of men come together to take an oath, make vows/pledges
and signed documents on how to be the father that their children need, I was so
moved by this movie and how these men took it upon themselves to stand up for
their families and always do the right thing no matter what, eventually one of
the men fell along the way due to the fact that it is not easy to be a real man
with a clean slate in the times we live in . It takes a man of integrity to
stay steadfast in the face of adversity……………….but thank God for the other guys
that stayed focused and true to the course.
Another thing is you cannot tell a
child to do A and you are seen doing B openly, it will never work as they must
always do what they see you doing. So if you are aggressive in the wrong ways
or abusive either verbally or physically, they see it as normal and tend to do
the same. In this case there must be consistency with our words and actions.
What kind of words do you speak to
your kids? Are they words that will make or mar them? What kind of seeds are
you sowing in them? Are they seeds that will yield good fruits or set them in
the path of destruction?
How many men will stand up with
their shoulders held up high and vouch that they have never at any time in
their lives compromised their beliefs just to make ends meet? Sadly the
campaign for a life of Integrity has been swept under the carpet; people look
at you strangely when you insist on doing things in the right and appropriate
way. They call you all sorts of names because you have principles that you
abide by. Your kids are watching and learning from you, they know far more than
you give them credit for especially in this day of technology……….you have to be
the strong voice that your child hears.
Most fathers of today didn’t have very
good examples or role models while growing up, but that should not be a
limiting factor cos there are a lot of opportunities available to you to make
it right now. You can choose a mentor from the great examples that exist now.
It’s never too late to make 360
degrees turn as long as you are turning away from the negative, you can still
make it work with your kids, all it takes is a step, make that commitment today
and have someone checkmate you constantly to keep you on the path.
The seed you sow in the kids today
will be the defining center for their future and generation, so wisdom is
essential while dealing with them.
I have to stop here for today; you
are welcome to leave your comments and contributions.
Cheers and stay fabulous……
